10 Reasons Why My Mom Should be President

1) Her presidential cabinet will consist of experts in finding shoes that fit (Department of the Insole), making microwave dinners taste homemade (Department of Homeland Mac and Cheese), and getting ketchup stains out of white clothes (Department of Clorox Security).
2) World leaders will be intimidated by her multitasking ability to negotiate a treaty and do her child’s math simultaneously.
3) All presidential limos will be replaced with bullet-proof minivans that come with a DVD player in the back seat.
4) Everyone in the nation will receive a “McDonalds Happy Meal” tax credit (during bad economic times an additional stimulus package will consist of a one Filet of Fish & McFlurry per family).
5) Her first 100 days in office will focus on making sure there are no dangerous electrical outlets in the West Wing.
6) The presidential seal will be replaced with the Gerber baby.
7) Her first choice for Vice President will be a reliable babysitter.
8) She would appoint “pro-early bedtime” Supreme Court Justices.
9) The leaders of the G-7 nations will be forced to play soccer on the front lawn of the White House during summits (two yellow cards and you get sent home).
10) The national anthem will be sung by Alvin and the Chipmunks.

Help! Mom's Stuck on Spin Cycle by Cheryl Moeller - as a Kindle eBook

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10 Things a Mom can Learn from a Cat

...You can cling to grass cloth wallpaper when trying to clean the ceiling.

...Laying in the sun with your eyes closed will make others think you're too important to interrupt.

...What birds are for.

....Just because your cell phone rings doesn't mean you have to answer it.

...Lay in the sun, even if you don't tan.

...Try not to obsess about your HDL, HDL, and triglyceride levels

...Not knowing how to use the TV remote control is not a bad thing

...To use the hand-held can opener, instead of electric. shhhh!

...Treating yourself to long and luxurious baths is a right, not a privilege.

...Always sniff what you are about to eat.

...Life is hard and then you nap.

...It's all about the hair.

(The picture is my sister Carolyn's cat.)

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(Biggby - I can never pronounce the name of this coffee shop correctly.)

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Now that you have your personalized favorite coffee, read Momlaughs blog today and laugh!

10 Things a Dog can Teach a Mom

1. Just Because...you take a nap, doesn't make you worthless.

2. Just Because...the newspaper is in your neighbor's driveway doesn't mean you can't read the headlines.

3. Just Because...you are grown up, doesn't mean you still don't like squeaky toys.

4. Just Because...you bark, doesn't mean people will listen.

5. Just Because...there's nothing in the refrigerator, doesn't mean there isn't anything to eat.

6. Just Because...there is a guest at your house, you have to like the guest.

7. Just Because...it's messy and drooling, doesn't make it a real kiss.

8. Just Because...you are inside doesn't mean you wish you weren't outside, and vice versa.

9. Just Because...you find something in the back yard, doesn't mean you have to eat it.

10. Just Because...you look at someone long enough with sad eyes, doesn't mean you will always get what you want (but it's worth a try).

You know it's time for summer to end...

1) When you start telling your kids that you're bored.
2) You've quit wearing perfume and instead settle for two sprays of misquoto repellent..
3) You've grilled everything you can think of including your husband's favorite pair of flip flops.
4) The only family vacation you want to take is to Slumberland.
5) You cut the grass in the shape of a giant calendar to you can mark the days until school starts.
6) You've started using the hedge clippers to trim your own hair.
7) The lemonade has turned ruby red -- exactly the same color as the tube of lipstick you can't find.
8) You've eaten so much sweet corn that you now chew your green beans holding them with both hands.
9) Your garden produced so many zucchinis that you have started hiding them in the purses of friends who visit.
10) You get caught trying to buy school supplies for yourself.

  MacKenzie (in the middle) at summer camp - How fun is that? Good-bye summer!