1. You offer to sew new curtains for Windows 2007.
2. You rush both your children to the doctor when they tell you the computer has a virus.
3. You put on lipstick and earrings and a puff of extra hair spray before visiting Facebook.
4. You asked the Best Buy salesman if you could have fries and a drink with your new Mac.
5. You scold your son for calling his friend a Yahoo.
6. You ask your neighbor if there really is a farmer in the Dell.
7. Your teenager stops you just in time from putting their Blackberry in a flaky pie crust and baking it on 350.
8. You continually correct your children's bad grammar for saying IPOD -- "You should say MEPOD instead -- and by the way, quit talking and finish your peas!"
9. You told your daughter to stop complaining about her hard drive -- when you were her age you had to walk three miles to school (and uphill in both directions).
10. You produce a can of Raid and search for a webmaster in the house -- they could be poisonous after all.
